Fish Squished

Taylor McCloud — Pats Militia

I told you the Patriots would treat that game like any other. I told you the Patriots weren’t going to hold back. I told you the Patriots would bury the Dolphins.

Now, were my predictions correct?


What you saw yesterday was a massacre. Bill Belichick and his pack of goons walked onto that embarrassment of a football field at Hard Rock Stadium and bundled the Miami Dolphins. Packed ’em up and sent ’em off like they were nothing.

And that’s pretty impressive, because Miami’s headed to the postseason. Yup, those Dolphins, the ones you watched yesterday, are a playoff football team. They’re one of the six best teams in the AFC, and with the exception of two drives, the Pats treated them like a high school JV team. I don’t know about you, but it’s wins like this that make me pretty damn confident in this Patriots team.

Having Tom Brady under center does, too.

Yesterday set the stage for a couple more milestones to be reached by TB, and guess what? He reached them.

First, he moved into fourth place for career passing yards. Flew right by Dan Marino on his home turf.

Then, with this 77YD TD pass to his son, Julian Edelman, Tom Brady set the record for the best TD/INT ratio in a single season. (28/2)

And before we look at something else in that clip, let me take a moment to address the haters.

Dear haters,

I’ve seen a lot of you talking about our lord and savior, Thomas Edward Patrick Brady Jr. Now, speaking on him is not a sin. However, speaking negatively about him is, and that’s what you’ve been doing. You’ve been diminishing this record. You’ve said it isn’t ‘that good’ because he did not play in the first four games of the season. Obviously, you have failed to take into account that those games were taken from him, but that is okay. You can be forgiven for that. You cannot be, however, for holding Nick Foles in higher regard than Tom Brady. Yes, he was the previous record holder, and that’s great, but Brady’s ratio is literally better. He threw 28 touchdowns and two interceptions. Foles threw 27 touchdowns and two interceptions. Plus, Brady recorded 115 more attempts this season than Foles did in 2013. That means that, despite missing four games, Brady had 115 more opportunities to throw more interceptions, and he did not. Thank you for your time. 

Now, where were we?

Oh, yeah, you can add another crime to Michael Floyd’s charge list because he legitimately MURDERED Tony Lippett on that Edelman TD.

Here’s one look.

Here’s a different one.

And here’s (I’m sorry for this.)


Throughout the course of a football game, I don’t get out of my seat much, but when Michael Floyd dropped this hammer, it was bananaland. Immediately jumped out of my chair and went NUTS. Probably looked a little bit like the Monmouth men’s basketball bench but hey, when a dude sends another one straight to the depths of hell on live television, anything goes.

If we’re being honest, though, I don’t even know if that block was Floyd’s best play of the day. Even though it was a bone crushing hit that sprung a touchdown, I think fighting through four defenders for a touchdown of your own might just be a little more impressive.

That right there was a Tony Montana-type performance. All these dudes from Miami coming at you in waves and you just keep mowing ’em down until you reach paydirt. (Tony Montana died, so this doesn’t work out perfectly, but you get the gist.)

When the Pats signed Floyd a couple of weeks ago, I didn’t expect much. So far, though, this experiment seems to be working. Since coming to New England, we’ve only heard positives. He works hard in practice, is constantly combing through the playbook, and it’s showing up on gameday. He wasn’t able to do a whole lot against the Jets, but Malcolm Mitchell was on the field. With Mitchell on the shelf yesterday, Floyd got some serious reps and made them count. That’s huge. The Patriots have been looking for this type of receiver for years, and it looks like they may have found him. Obviously there are some other circumstances that will affect his future with the team, but for this season, for this Super Bowl push, he’ll be here, and he’ll be big.

And so will this defense.

I’ve taken this angle multiple times, but this group has shut us up since the Seattle game. After we tore them apart following that loss on Sunday Night Football, they’ve been lockdown. They reclaimed the top spot in both points allowed, and points allowed per game. They finished twelfth for pass yards allowed per game, third in rush yards allowed per game, and eighth in overall yards allowed per game. And after going almost an entire month without forcing a turnover, they’ve forced fourteen in the past six games, including these two yesterday.

First, Logan Ryan snatched this ball from Matt Moore.

Then, Devin McCourty punched a ball lose and Shea McLellin returned it 69YD.

And that forced fumble and recovery prompted this reaction from Tom Brady, so I’d say it was pretty good.

But what’s also pretty good, and the most important thing to take away from this game, is that the Patriots locked up the one seed and secured homefield advantage throughout the playoffs.

I’ve been harping on this, but last year sucked. The Patriots had everything within their grasp. All they had to do was win one of their two final games, and things would have been different. They would have been the first seeded team, they would have had homefield advantage, and that would have been huge. Yes, that Broncos defense would have featured the same personnel, but I have a hard time believing that a noodle-armed Peyton Manning would have come into Gillette and beaten the Patriots for the AFC Championship. Unfortunately, we didn’t get to see that. The Patriots lost both of their last two games and  things fell apart.

That didn’t happen this year. They took these last two games, and they dominated them. There was not let up, there was no coasting, just good football. They’re the best team in the NFL, and they ended the season like it. There’s certainly an importance that comes with the regular season, but now that it’s over, the real season begins. The playoffs are a different animal, but when the Patriots are playing like this, the playoffs are my favorite animal.

Go Pats.






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