If Tom Brady Says I Need Special Pajamas To Recover, Then I Need Special Pajamas To Recover

Taylor McCloud — Pats Militia

I don’t even know what to say.

I thought sleep was just sleep. You shut your eyes, fall into deep sleep, dream a couple dreams, and wake up feeling fresh as lettuce. To me, it’s never mattered what you wear to bed. It’s just been about getting some solid hours in the REM cycle, and making sure I don’t forget to breathe.

But what a simple-minded idiot I’ve been.

To be honest, I can’t believe I’ve been this ignorant. For me to ignore the importance of shirts with infrared technology which minimize inflammation in the body was childish. I should have known better. You would have thought after eighteen years doing this I would have figured it out, but no, I didn’t. Because I was so stupid, so blind to the obvious, I’ve been wearing normal clothes to bed for ages. God damn I’m such a scrub.

I shouldn’t have needed Tom Brady to tell me this. I should have known, but I dropped the ball. All of this typing, tweeting, and watching sports on television is a grind, and I’ve never recovered correctly. I guess I can go out and buy some of these Under Armour recovery pajamas, but I think I might be too far gone. The effects of wearing tee shirts and sweatpants to bed are obviously of the worst kind, and I’ve been doing it for my whole life.

Go Pats.

UPDATE: Brady wore the damn pajamas to a press conference. 

Some might guess he’s rubbing it in my face. I don’t believe that, but even if he is, I deserve this. 

 

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